09:09:05

rover gang rover gang rover gang (a Mars rover)

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09:15:47

If I send you a reply that says "womp womp" It means I didn't have the heart to block you

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09:16:48

miracles, how do they work https://t.co/pErgKRHwo1

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09:25:11

đŸĒĢ who's with me

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10:01:11

feel the pressure, under more scrutiny What do I do?

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10:03:19

If I can't enjoy dog ice cream, I don't want to be a part of your revolution

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10:15:44

ALMOST DONDA out now, I'm enjoying it so far

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10:47:45

I will be hosting the high disagreeability cabin at vibe camp. grumpy is a vibe too

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10:49:07

Who wants to produce public facing work at me đŸĨē

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10:58:53

me logging into twitter for the day https://t.co/tIVp5Rerv4

image from twitter

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11:00:56

You are all so very legible 😘

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11:37:06

What day of the month are you born on? I'm trying to see something

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11:59:38

I used to teach "defense against the dark arts" in my cabin at witch camp. sometimes we would do lectures but mostly it was a lab class. We would pass around a bottle of whiskey and attempt to psychically attack each other. or trade bigger and bigger secrets, winner take all

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12:00:22

At least one of the people who attended is now dead, although I don't think it was related. One went missing in South America with a copy of my manuscript...

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12:03:16

One guy kept bringing nice whiskey because he was trying to date my girlfriend out from under me. he made like he was trying to be my friend first, of course. clumsy, low-level dark arts fortunately for me, I was trying to stop dating her. so it worked out

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12:07:32

Good thinking. You have to think like the dark arts to defend against the arts. In this case, I already wanted to detach from her but had been on a months-long hitchhiking journey involving deep emotional trauma together. we had only just reached safety https://t.co/TR3QvVPZfD

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12:08:54

unfortunately, I was shortly fooled again, by his ex, who looked at me with a glint in her eye and said "wouldn't it be fucked up if we..." and then we did. queue another year long cycle of romance, reckless abandon, reckoning with the wretched results of reckless abandon, etc

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12:28:29

The prophecy is coming true! THE GRUMPIES SHALL RISE

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12:50:08

you want me to wear tartan. The thing that kilt the Highlander

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13:42:52

okay I'm no longer responding to this until it has more likes than replies. Do not ratio me on nice tweets

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14:19:27

I can't listen to this transition without grinning ear to ear https://t.co/VmUkOYjPoN

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15:31:08

want

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17:17:26

drill beats sound like bugs crawling on me (good)

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17:27:27

big box stores are crazy. like you got a whole place just for selling this one type of thing

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17:32:08

How do rappers not just constantly have a cold. All they do is meet new people, smoke weed, hang out in a little booth with no airflow

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17:58:16

So glad I didn't make the mistake of thinking there was a real social circle on Twitter that I could rely on to have intellectual conversations

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19:19:41

you want me to go on vacation. the thing that killed Chevy Chase

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20:07:11

I'm excited to have intellectual conversations at vibe camp

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20:41:36

I hope someday I write a meme post and somebody else writes a 100 tweet thread about why it's the decline of Western civilization. That would be amusing

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21:01:47

What if our world was ruled by invisible entities with their own purposes, secret organizations with unknowable budgets, who's on members don't even know what they have done or why. haha

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21:18:34

lot of mfers out here writing about a version of Elon Musk that lives in their heads. it's fanfiction. Even if their haters they're creating the Musk Cinematic Universe

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21:24:32

What if superhero movies are actually a really great commentary on isolation and anonymity, the construction of the public self, and the super empowerment of the individual through technological enhancement

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22:14:54

🤭

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22:17:34

One thing about Twitter group chats is that if anyone in them blocks you, you lose access to your private friend group. This creates interesting dynamics when the person who has been blocked has to see all those people on the TL And feel betrayed, even though they had no choice

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22:20:06

starting a school: Copecademy

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22:20:44

More people should learn how to cope

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22:25:07

Shocking: Illegibility Club Falls Apart Due To Newly Revealed Differences

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