possibly the best conflict tweet I've ever seen

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bicycle Bicycle BICYCLE

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first among betters

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This was supposed to be a moving gif. static image really not as impressive

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corporations should not be considered people under the law. That way they don't have to pay taxes πŸ˜‡

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my view on dumplings lady

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the website for the Juvet agenda no longer lists Warren Ellis. i wonder how long till the next name is removed from the list. how long until it's empty, and the document becomes apocryphal, like it sprang fully formed from the fjords of Norway... https://t.co/4slT273ArH

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The milk I put in my coffee is sour. but I'm drinking it anyway cuz it's good coffee. At least it's not spicy like goat milk

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what if it was a she-cession and it was an economic downturn just for the ladies

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i win again

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This little dude has nothing in common with you https://t.co/otZ6kh4bXE

image from twitter

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heartbreaking: the worst person you know made a very ironic life choice but you don't want to talk about it because it's already blowing up the TL

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broke: naps woke: stay awake and grind

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People be sleeping on being awake

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current affairs used to do voicemails on their podcast, where they would answer questions from their listeners. One time I called it shitfaced drunk and asked "where does the money come from. The money to publish. what is it come from. You all went to Harvard. Who pays for this"

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I did not receive an answer

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Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I sobbing on company time

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when i see you likeing all my tweets https://t.co/9mNMBISomL

image from twitter

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started making my coffee half decaf and life has gotten so much more chill

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growing my hair out. not fine to worry about shit anymore. just cruising

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i mean i still feel the urge to solve all the world's problems. but I don't have to do it like, today

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The reason everyone lacks gravitas: because they grow up on TV shows, where quick banter is made to seem funny by adding a laugh track. So they think they always have to be bantering. And on TV all pauses must be dramatic

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I will not send money to your Venmo, and I will not send good vibes. I don't care what you're doing. these vibes are mine

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what are your precise pickle-reheating techniques? (this is a competition)

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this is my life https://t.co/iY1deKCYCK

image from twitter

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it's a literary high. a Kafka high

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women complain about bedframes but literally have a room that looks like this https://t.co/nxkSjcUwy7

image from twitter

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All right, I'll bite. what is a 'group chat"

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what is the difference between taxing and tithing

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Getting everyone named Max in one group chat. that's maxmaxxing

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zoomers are so powerful. imagine growing up with a tiny magic book that can tell you how to learn any skill, get buff, become an expert on any subject, and contact people worldwide in real time. they're literally all Diamond Age prodigies

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Don't underestimate the amount of stuff you can get done in 20 second bursts. Do 100 20-second things, you've got over half an hour of material πŸŒˆπŸ‘‘

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if you haven't seen this yet, please take to the time to watch it. It makes me giggle every time. This is the future of interfaces: the collaborative human-agent dialogue

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conclusion: one of them you pay because you hate paying it. The other one you pay because you love paying it

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I asked my cat to marry her and she said meow. I'm so happy. truly love conquers all

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I just got finished taking a (small-ish) dose of LSD to Get my sense of human communication norms back after autism and it totally worked. It’s back online. Like a light switch, bam, online. Wtf, psychedelics

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A clip from Jay-Z's the story of OJ has been popular on my TikTok feed lately. I wonder if these kids know what they're singing to

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Y'all thought I was joking https://t.co/h7MjuVW0Ij

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TL full of Afghanistan takes for the last week, interspersed with ads for mobile games screaming MANY FAILED BEFORE! THANK YOU CAN DO BETTER?!

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if you don't watch much TV, your probably underestimating its effect on human minds

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import deepfates as df

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I thought I would like it better if I were around a group of people who explicitly admitted which god they serve instead of a bunch who don't know what I'm talking about when I say that but then I found out which gods they are

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everybody likes the journalist when they're revealing some secrets you didn't know yet. everybody hates the journalist when they revealing the secrets of your cool friend group

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The more powerful you are, the more incentive people have to offer you something you can't resist. eventually someone will show up who you can't say no to. This is how you get the billionaire divorcee

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what I get from the midwit meme is the people on the tail ends always be mad at all the people in the middle and make a bunch of memes about it

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*gruffly* It has come to my attention it's some of you have never been exposed to one of These https://t.co/IYeuB3AxjS

image from twitter

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writing "subtweeting is good actually" 100 times on a chalkboard

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the circuit model of consciousness is a bastardized version of the chakra system, imported into technoscientific chart jargon by Timothy Leary. further elaborated on by Robert Anton Wilson and Antero Alli. This imagery is from e Psychonaut Field Manual by bluefluke https://t.co/GDvFEvGm6N

image from twitter

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