07:09:55

if you like "threads" wait till you find out about "books"

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07:31:51

Beards: are they pubes? Tonight at 11

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07:32:38

we have a winner https://t.co/AjTAQm4gXa

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08:47:05

Belief is one of the most dangerous drugs bc of how not dangerous it seems

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08:50:38

what I really need in a productivity app is something that remembers what I'm supposed to do and keeps asking me if I've done it till I've done it

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09:12:52

"Hello deepfates. Your laundry has been finished for several hours. Are you ready to move it to the dryer?"

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09:22:28

Unpopular opinion: The best thing young people can do early in their careers is take a 1 level dip in Vivisectionist Alchemist so they get sneak attack and mutagens plus the ability to cast arcane scrolls

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09:54:34

what should i buy

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10:12:09

Tiger King

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10:26:21

what is the one essential book that you think everybody should read

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11:47:51

Warhammer to dentist pipeline. why is nobody taking about this

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11:48:13

more like horny freak summer, am i right

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12:02:36

thinking about getting some really long boxers to wear with my 5" shorts

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12:15:53

how to defeat a bear

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12:18:01

new flavor of seltzer dropped https://t.co/T2JYAmIs73

image from twitter

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12:22:18

one bad gloop and she do what i yoinky

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12:29:43

Help, my brainworms are producing the Spice Melange, commonly referred to simply as 'the spice', a naturally produced awareness spectrum narcotic that formed a fundamental block of commerce and technological development in the known universe for millennia

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12:50:39

what's the best scrambler style electric bike? ideally less than $2k and can seat two

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12:52:55

this account have finally reached the size ive always wanted, where i can just RT underappreciated posts and they get tons of likes we are all working together

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13:27:07

battlefield control https://t.co/ovAMqX5q0J

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13:34:05

🔮 you know what do

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13:38:32

tfw when the Dungeons and Dragons players are eager to get the campaign started again after a 2 week break 🤗

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13:41:52

no one knows what it's like... 🥲 https://t.co/CfizkH9Lw8

image from twitter

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13:48:38

bruh

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13:49:37

better to close your mouth and be thought a notetaking expert, than to open it and remove all doubt

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13:51:20

if you want to join my bash'house reply to this tweet

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13:57:04

just found out what "Tools for Thought" means, smh. this whole time i thought it was an unlikely booster club, like "Jews for Jesus" or "Blacks for Trump"

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14:09:13

https://t.co/hBF5YaknYy

image from twitter

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14:11:18

how do i convince him 😅 https://t.co/BejkObq5k5

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14:23:50

there are a lot of people out there who literally think we live in the Bible Cinematic Universe

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14:34:02

this is a lot of fun 😂 https://t.co/PYgCttEM2O

image from twitter

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14:42:21

I'm going to do something

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15:15:41

hey, I know you've been waiting to hear this, it's okay to buy books you'll never read

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15:36:01

genres don't really exist. but authors do

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15:38:49

You can only use this cheat answer if you pick a specific one. I have three right here on my floor https://t.co/We0sZL2r0F https://t.co/KGDCbnD2t9

image from twitter

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16:24:39

babe come look, my losses are converging, i can't pause it! babe come LOOK my LOSSES are CONVERGING! my LOSSES ARE CONVERGING come see it BABE COME SEE IT

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16:29:19

most people don't read past chapter 3 in any given book. source: i am used bookseller and i find all the bookmarks. but this is okay, because most authors don't have more than 3 chapters worth of stuff to say

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16:32:40

you can just create a bot that retweets any posts with certain shibboleths in it and create a scene

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16:44:38

I found this awesome new pasta sauce at the store, it's called TaPAtio https://t.co/8vg477K9dU

image from twitter

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16:46:28

I was wrong, obviously this one is Original flavor, it says so right there

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16:56:20

Bookland is a fictitious country that exists solely in EAN for the purposes of non-geographically cataloguing books in the otherwise geographically keyed EAN coding system. https://t.co/eUMhM02oNJ

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16:58:42

🤌

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17:14:48

this was just a tease

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17:21:55

i'm going to make an algorithm that finds Classicness in books, and people are going to squeal "that's not true classicness! that's just some arbitrary function that you are calling classicness!" and i'm gonna be like "Yes." because that's how naming things works

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17:23:44

you might think it seems like a conflict of interest for me, a bookseller, to incept your mind with the desire for books. but actually it's just a regular of interest

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18:00:22

https://t.co/FHKAcrnzzm

image from twitter

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18:35:10

Here are some of the funniest MDHPMOR tweets: 1. Ron begins a series of experiments to try to convince Harry of the existence of the heroic qualities of jealousy.

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18:35:11

4. Tom Riddle Jr., a.k.a. Voldemort's son, is visited by an intuitive statistician who asks him to build the Deathly Hallows. Riddle doesn't know what to do.

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18:35:11

3. Hermione is trying to give two months notice at Hogwarts when a strange man accosts her. 'Pleased to meet you. I'm Eliezer Yudkowsky, your advisor for the next two months. I expect you'll be doing great work.'

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18:35:11

2. Draco finds himself in two concurrent polyamorous relationships. Bayesian reasoning tells him that neither has a future, but he can't stop.

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18:35:12

12. Hermione is telling Harry about how she believes that love is a statistical concept, and that it relates to the likelihood of a relationship surviving.

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18:35:12

9. The remaining Death Eaters get into a prison debate about whether incarcerating wizards as dangerous criminals is a good idea. 11. Ginny and Harry have a series of fights about jealousy, the economics of commitment, the nature of romantic love, and the biology of reproductio

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18:35:12

7. Hogwarts has become an educational institution for young witches and wizards. They have full control over the curriculum, and their new motto is: 'No more students, only problem-solvers.' 8. Harry and Ginny argue about whether she is a sociopath or just a little bit disturbe

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18:35:12

5. Hogwarts is now being used as a prison for the remaining Death Eaters, who are forced to use Bayesian reasoning to survive. 6. Harry and Hermione, in their first week of post-Hogwarts employment, talk about the true nature of causality.

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18:35:13

13. Harry is trying to find a non-emotional way to convince Ron that jealousy is evil. Ron has to figure out how to reconcile his commitment to Jealousy Theory with his love for Hermione.

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18:48:08

mute this tweet if you don't want to see a bunch of stuff all sudden

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18:53:03

Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality Written by an anonymous author from the "postrat" community on twitter, HMPOP is a fanfiction of the Eliezer Yudkowsky-written Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, itself a fanfiction of Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling.

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18:53:04

He now lives in an alternate world called the “Universe”.

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18:53:04

He has spent the last 12 years of his life in the Muggle community, an outcast of Muggles. His stories have made him the most famous wizard in history, and he has been seen by many people in both the Muggle and wizarding worlds. He has also been killed by Voldemort seven times.

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18:53:04

Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality Chapter 1 Harry Potter was born on a summer’s evening in Privet Drive in 1949. He was sent to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in 1971, and was expelled from Hogwarts in 1995.

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18:53:04

In HPMOP, Harry Potter is a young chaos wizard who dares impossible odds to save You Know Who (Voldemort) from the Dark Side. HMPOP was first published on Twitter, so each paragraph is a tweet long. Here is the first page of Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality:

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18:53:05

“Eliezer Yudkowsky,” said Harry. “Who’s that?” asked Hermione. “He’s from the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes,” said Harry. “You know, he’s in the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes.” “What does he do?” asked Ron. “He’s the Director,” said Harry

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18:53:05

“I’m with Hermione,” said Harry, “I think the only way to get someone back to Hogwarts is to send them to Hogwarts.” “That’s exactly what I was thinking,” said Ron. “There’s a way, but I don’t know how it works.” “I know someone who might know,” said Harry. “Who?” asked Ron.

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18:53:05

Harry and Ron were sitting on Ron’s bed, and Hermione was standing in front of the window. “We’ve only got two options. We can either figure out how to get Harry back to Hogwarts, or how to get Voldemort back to Hogwarts,” said Ron.

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18:53:05

A house meeting was held at the Great Hall of Hogwarts. Harry and his two friends, Ron and Hermione, were in a little secret chamber near the Great Hall. They were discussing how to get their lost robes back.

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18:53:06

“Um, they record accidents and catastrophes,” said Harry. “They record the causes of accidents and catastrophes, so we can understand them.” “So they’re a sort of insurance company for wizards?” asked Ron.

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18:53:06

“Well, it sounds like a load of rubbish,” said Ron. “It’s not,” said Harry. “What does the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes do?” asked Hermione.

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18:53:06

“What’s a postrat?” asked Ron. “I’m not exactly sure,” said Harry. “I think it’s something to do with making post-rational decisions.” “It’s when you stop making decisions based on emotion and start making them based on reason,” said Ron. “That’s what it is,” said Harry.

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18:53:06

. “So he’s in charge?” asked Hermione. “Yes,” said Harry. “I’m a bit confused,” said Hermione. “How can he be Director of the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes, and also Director of the Department of Magic?” “He’s a postrat,” said Harry.

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18:53:07

“Hello,” said Eliezer Yudkowsky. “So what do you want to talk to me about?” “We’re looking for some robes,” said Harry. “We were in a fire last night, and we lost them.” “What colour?” asked Eliezer. “The same as yours,” said Hermione. “The same colour as yours.”

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18:53:07

“Okay,” said Ron. “I’ll see you later.” Hermione and Harry walked to the Great Hall. Harry was wearing his long red robes, and Hermione was wearing her grey robes. They walked to the great hall, and entered. “Hello,” said Harry.

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18:53:07

“I don’t know,” said Ron. “It might be dangerous.” “I think I can handle it,” said Hermione. “I’m a bit more experienced with him than you are.” “Okay,” said Ron. “Let’s go see Eliezer.” “I’ll come with you,” said Harry. “I want to be part of this.”

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18:53:07

“No,” said Harry. “They take the information from wizards that are injured or killed, and they find out how to stop wizards from being injured or killed.” “That’s a bit sinister,” said Ron. “It is,” said Harry. “So do we want to talk to him?”

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18:53:08

“Quiet,” said Eliezer. “I’m going to take you to the Ministry of Magic.” They walked into the Ministry of Magic. They walked down a corridor, and through a door. They walked down a flight of stairs, and into a large room. “What’s going on?” asked Harry. “Quiet,” said Eliezer.

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18:53:08

“Yes, that’s easy,” said Eliezer. “I’ll take you to the Ministry of Magic.” They walked down a corridor, and through a door. They walked down a flight of stairs, and into a large room. “What’s going on?” asked Harry.

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18:53:08

Eliezer took Harry and Hermione down a corridor, and out a door. They walked down a flight of stairs, and into an office. There were three chairs in the office, and a large desk. “So what can I do for you?” asked Eliezer. “Can you take us to the Ministry of Magic,” said Harry.

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18:53:08

“You want to see them?” asked Eliezer. “Yes,” said Harry. “I’ll take you to my office,” said Eliezer. “It’s not far.”

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18:55:53

finally the definition

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18:57:25

why is this so funny🤣

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18:58:22

shoutout to GPT-J-6B and this person for inspiring the prompt https://t.co/1Z2O3HpAea

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19:06:49

Here is the second page of Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality:

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19:06:50

Sometimes he felt as if he was running through a forest, and then he'd look up and see that he was still in the middle of a field. Other times, he would emerge from an old and decrepit house into a modern town.

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19:06:50

He had been on the run for weeks. In fact, he had been running for over a year. He hadn't eaten in days, and he was sick of the pain. Voldemort had caught up with him in the end. It was hard to tell where he was at any given moment.

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19:06:50

One of the most important things that wizards learn is the ability to hide. To hide is to become invisible, to go unnoticed, and to go unnoticed is to not be seen. One day, however, Harry was shocked to find that he had failed in this attempt.

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19:06:51

Harry started to feel dizzy. He felt like he was going to fall to the ground. He was very sure that this was what death would be like, and he was glad that he had not died in his parents' car, when Voldemort had crushed his head into the steering wheel. But he couldn't feel that

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19:06:51

He was in a place where the buildings looked like they were made of stone, and the people looked like they were made of stone. He was in a place where the blue sky seemed to stretch on forever. He felt like he had been walking in this place for hours.

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19:06:51

And sometimes, he would find himself in a place that was so ancient that it looked like it had been built in a different time altogether. So it was that he came to a city.

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19:06:52

Harry was glad to see Neville, and he looked up at him with his shining eyes. "I'm glad to see you," said Harry. Neville just smiled. "It's good to see you too, Harry," he said. "I'm sorry about your parents," said Harry. "I am so sorry."

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19:06:52

He ran his hands through his hair, and then he felt a familiar presence. The presence was a person. And it was the person that he loved. It was Neville Longbottom, who was a fellow member of the Order of the Phoenix.

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19:06:52

he was going to die. He felt like he could keep running. Harry found the strength to drag himself to a nearby bench. He looked up at the sky and considered how it was possible for this place to stretch on forever.

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19:06:53

"I don't know if any of us will survive." Harry looked at Neville and he thought of Ginny. "I don't know how this will end," he said. "I don't know what Voldemort has planned. I don't know if I can beat him. I don't know if we'll have another chance at defeating him.

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19:06:53

Neville looked sad, and then he said, "I don't know where the others are. They've been leading the Order of the Phoenix and they haven't returned. You know what it's like. You know, you're supposed to be the chosen one. You're supposed to be the one who can save us all.

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19:06:53

"It's alright," said Neville. "I have a family. "Do you? That's good."

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19:06:54

Neville started to cry. Harry reached out and held Neville's hand. "Come with me," said Harry.

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19:06:54

I don't know if I can defeat Voldemort. I have to keep on running." "Harry," said Neville. "It's okay. I don't think that you can defeat him. I think that we'll win. I think that Voldemort will lose. I think that Voldemort will be dead. I think that we'll win."

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19:06:55

They ran through the stone streets of the city. Harry looked down and saw that Neville was holding his hand. "I won't let go of your hand," said Neville. "I know," said Harry. "Keep holding my hand." They ran until the pain got too much for Harry.

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19:06:55

They gave them a place to sleep. Harry was about to ask them if they would also help him find Ginny, but he didn't have time. He had to run. "Neville, come with me," he said. Neville nodded, and then he reached out for Harry's hand.

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19:06:55

They walked through the stone streets of the city, and Harry led Neville to a house that was on a hill. The house had a lovely garden, and it looked like it had been recently built. The people who lived there were kind to Harry and to Neville. They gave them some food.

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19:06:56

Neville and Harry stood in the old and decrepit house. The house was cool, and the ground beneath their feet was smooth. "Harry," said Neville. "I'm scared. I think that it's better if you do it alone. I'm scared that you'll fail. I don't think that you can do it."

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19:06:56

"I have to try," said Harry. Neville nodded. "I don't know what the others think," said Neville. "I don't know if I can trust them. But I think that they'll come back. I think that they'll be back. "I hope so," said Harry. "I hope that they'll come back."

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19:06:56

"Neville, I can't keep running forever," said Harry. "Why are you afraid of this?" said Neville. "Voldemort is the most powerful wizard that has ever lived. I don't know if I have the strength to defeat him. I don't know if anyone can defeat him." Neville didn't say anything.

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19:06:57

"I was so lonely. And you were the first person I saw. I just want to say that I am sorry for what I did to you. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I'm sorry that I hurt you so much. It was a stupid thing to do." "It's okay," said Neville. "I forgive you. I'm glad you're back."

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19:06:57

"It's okay," said Neville. "It's alright. I'm with you." "I'm sorry," said Harry. "Don't be," said Neville. Harry closed his eyes. "I'm glad you came back," said Harry.

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19:06:57

Neville reached out for Harry's hand. Harry took a deep breath. "I don't know what to do," he said. "I don't know how to defeat Voldemort. I don't know if it's possible. I don't know how to defeat Voldemort. I don't know what to do."

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19:11:40

(5) Harry's chance at living a life of happiness had been twisted into a chance at dying with Voldemort. (6) If he saved Harry, then he might very well save Voldemort. (7) No one will ever know if he was right, or if he could have stopped him from dying in his prime.

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19:11:40

(2) Harry succeeded because he allowed himself to think less than ten percent of the time. (3) Harry Potter is an expert in the ways of post-rationality. (4) Harry had to be Harry.

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19:11:40

Here is the third page of Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality: (1) The day Hermione became Harry's, Voldemort no longer had a clear path to the true form of his power. Voldemort had the power to possess people or to kill them instantly, but he had neither.

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19:11:41

(14) If he was going to change the world, he would first have to change himself. (15) Harry Potter was no longer going to use his psychic talents as a way to suppress his emotions, but as a way to understand them.

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19:11:41

(11) If Harry could live, then he could finally take the time to think about how to be good. (12) Thinking was his most important weapon. (13) Harry Potter was now on a quest to change the ways of thinking.

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19:11:41

(8) Harry's desire for a normal life should never be the same as Voldemort's desire to live, or to rule. (9) But it was the same desire. (10) And Harry would have no one to blame but himself if he died without Voldemort.

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19:11:42

(16) He was going to learn how to talk to people about their emotions, and maybe even understand them. (17) Maybe even help them.

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19:14:24

Here is the fourth page of Harry Potter and the Methods of Postrationality: "The pair look up at Harry and Ginny, then at each other. "You're different," says Ginny. "From when we first met." "It's not just that," Harry says. "It's you." "What do you mean?"

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19:14:25

"I'm glad you say so. But...I want to do something for you." "Oh?" "Yes. I want to fix you up." "What? What do you mean?" Ginny smiles and walks over to Harry. "I want to make you more like Ron." "Like him?" "I mean, different. Different to how you are now."

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19:14:25

"No, it's all right," says Harry. He can't help looking over at the kitchen, which is where the train crash happened. Ginny has it pretty bad. She had to use the invisibility cloak a lot to get away from the worst of it. "No, I'm fine. It's all right."

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19:14:25

"We've all known each other for a long time. You're really different now. You've grown up. You're a woman." "Oh, yeah? Who's going to stop me?" Ginny twirls her wand playfully. "Can I get you some tea, Harry? And a pumpkin juice?"

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19:14:26

"I can't even begin to imagine what that would be like." "You shouldn't have to. All I know is I wish I were more like him." Harry sighs. "I'm still Ron. And Ron's...well, Ron."

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19:14:26

"Because he's cute, and kind, and smart, and he gets things right. And...he's nice to me. He's nice to everyone." Harry looks down at his feet. "Ron would never do that." "Yes, he would. If he really loved you. If you really meant something to him."

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19:14:26

"Different how?" "I know you don't want to hear this, but...I want to make you more like Ron Weasley." Harry hesitates, but the idea is just too ridiculous to resist. "Why?"

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19:14:27

Ginny smiles. "You're right. I don't really know anything about Ron except that he's your friend. And I really want to do this, because...he'd be really happy for me."

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20:36:33

How would you load a 10 GB JSON file into a data frame? assuming you don't have enough memory even including swap file

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21:13:55

dressing like Picasso for the rest of the summer

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21:14:19

gf who makes tendies from scratch (real)

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21:17:31

finally. "not girl summer"

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21:23:12

if we're mutuals and you're a teenager this is what I think you look like https://t.co/hFak6jgvlq

image from twitter

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22:20:14

who called it Generation X and not the X-Men

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22:22:18

sometimes you have to steal data from academics https://t.co/jx5FExTZ2O

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22:23:33

I just watched this episode and it's where they think their friend is literally dead in front of them so that's kind of awkward

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23:42:26

I'm feeling my girlfriend is getting into m&M's

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23:43:01

multi-level marketing

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23:52:43

why impress girl by having thousands of Twitter followers, when you could impress girl by getting thousands of Twitter followers right in front of her

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23:53:23

my pick is SIGNAL: A Book of Secrets and you can download it at https://t.co/93PBwdld7L

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